Originally Posted by eva_from_greece
What I mean is that they cannot force me, but they would like me to be different, and I see every day they like me less. For obvious reasons.
Please give me more scriptures to read. I need to study things that fit my situation now
OK, that makes sense and I understand now. I didn't think you meant it the way it was said. Thanks for explaining.
Well, there are many reasons other people can not like us. Some of them are the "right" reasons, and some are the "wrong" reasons. What I mean is that if we are acting mean toward them, or speak down to them, acting like we know better then they do, or like we are better people then they are, they will not like us and those are all the "wrong" reasons because God doesn't want us to act that way. If we are being friendly, peaceful -not starting or continuing arguments, smiling and being loving and helpful toward them at all times, and have a quiet, gentle spirit, they will also not like us the more we act that way, but those are the "right" reasons, because that's the way the Lord wants us to act. Do you see what I mean?
I already gave you James 4:4, 1 Peter 2:11, 1 Peter 1:1, 1 Peter 1:17 and Philippians 3:18–20. Let me see what else I can find for you.
2 Corinthians 6:14-17 Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: “I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people.” “Therefore come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you.”
Ephesians 5:3-7 But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality, or of any kind of impurity, or of greed, because these are improper for Gods holy people. Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving. For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person- such a man is an idolater- has any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of such things Gods wrath comes on those who are disobedient. Therefore do not be partners with them.
Psalms 1:1-2 Blessed is the man Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly, Nor stands in the path of sinners, Nor sits in the seat of the scornful; But his delight is in the law of the Lord, And in His law he meditates day and night.
Luke 6:22 Blessed are you when men hate you, when they exclude you and insult you and reject your name as evil, because of the Son of Man.
Matthew 10:22 "And you will be hated by all for My name's sake. But he who endures to the end will be saved.
John 15:18-21 If the world hates you, keep in mind that it hated me first. If you belonged to the world, it would love you as its own. As it is, you do not belong to the world, but I have chosen you out of the world. That is why the world hates you. Remember the words I spoke to you: No servant is greater than his master. If they persecuted me, they will persecute you also. If they obeyed my teaching, they will obey yours also. They will treat you this way because of my name, for they do not know the One who sent me.
1 Peter 2:9 But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, His own special people, that you may proclaim the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His marvelous light;
1 Peter 3:15-16 But in your hearts set apart Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect, keeping a clear conscience, so that those who speak maliciously against your good behavior in Christ may be ashamed of their slander.
John 15:19 "If you were of the world, the world would love its own. Yet because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, therefore the world hates you.
1 Corinthians 15:33 Do not be misled: Bad company corrupts good character.
1 Thessalonians 5:22 Abstain from all appearance of evil.
Romans 12:14–18 —Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. *Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. *Live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited. *Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. *If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.
Romans 12:19–21 —Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath, for it is written: “It is mine to avenge; I will repay,” says the Lord. *On the contrary: “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head.” *Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good. *
I think Rom 12:18, really sums up how the Lord wants us to act toward everyone: if possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. We are to be kind, friendly and helpful to everyone, especially those who are mean to us. and then Romans 12:19-21 explains more about how to do that with those who are mean to us. It's actually a quote from Proverbs 25:21–22 —If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat; if he is thirsty, give him water to drink. *In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, and the Lord will reward you. *
Notice that I said we're to be "friendly" toward everyone, and I did not say that we are to be "friends" with everyone. This is hard to explain because different people define friendship in different ways. By "friends", I mean someone you want to spend a lot of your leisure time with, someone you want to do things with and spend a lot of time talking to about things you wouldn't tell other people who were not your close friends. There are many different degrees of relationships we have. We have acquaintances which are people we have met, but we don't know them hardly at all. We have a casual relationship with them and not an intimate one. Then we have "associates" which are people we have met and know a little because we see them a lot because of work or some common interest, but we usually don't have any contact with them outside of that. An associate could also be called a "co-worker". A "friend" though, is someone we know well, like, and trust, and want to spend a lot of time with whenever we can.
While the Lord wants us to be loving and friendly toward everyone, He does not want us to have close friendships with people who are not saved. (which obviously would include not marrying them either) In other words, we can be friends in the sense of liking them and they like us, but we should keep the relationship with them at a little distance if they are not born again so that we don't become corrupted by them. Actually when you think about it, we shouldn't have that much in common with someone who isn't saved anyway. They like the things of this world and we shouldn't be that interested in them. Our main interest in people who are unsaved should be to love them so much we want to see them saved and that we would talk to them about that very thing whenever we had the opportunity.
If we look to Jesus as our example, while He did spend time with the unsaved, it was always to bring them the good news of salvation, not to just relax or have a good time. For that, He spent time with His disciples. We also see that this is what the Lord told Israel right from the very start, but they disobeyed Him and that's what got them in so much trouble and caused them to sin so much.
In the past, it was how most Christians acted too. While they were friendly toward the unsaved, their close friends were others people who were also saved. They wouldn't have dreamed of having a close friendship with someone who wasn't saved. However, in today's world, it's no longer like that. Today we see believers who are best friends with unbelievers constantly, as well as believers who marry unbelievers constantly. Seeing how this is what caused Israel's downfall, it's no wonder the majority of Christians have fallen from the faith now too. The Lord obviously has very good reasons for telling us that we're not be close friends with unbelievers.
When the Lord first showed me this, I was very surprised, but it does make sense. He tells us that bad company corrupts morals, but the world thinks the other way. According to the world's way of thinking, the good should befriend that bad in order to teach the bad people to be good, right? Only God says it doesn't work that way. He says we should instead teach them about Him when we see them, and not be close to them unless or until they are saved. Then and only then are we to allow ourselves to become real friends with them. Again this makes sense because if we truly love God and hate evil, (not the people, the evil that causes them to do bad), then why would we want to spend a lot of time around people who have totally different morals and desires then we do and who don't understand things about God, creation, the bible, etc. like we do? These next verses describe what we used to be and what the unsaved still are, and remind us that we're not to be like that anymore.
Colossians 3:5–11 —Put to death, therefore, whatever belongs to your earthly nature: sexual immorality, impurity, lust, evil desires and greed, which is idolatry. *Because of these, the wrath of God is coming. *You used to walk in these ways, in the life you once lived. *But now you must rid yourselves of all such things as these: anger, rage, malice, slander, and filthy language from your lips. *Do not lie to each other, since you have taken off your old self with its practices *and have put on the new self, which is being renewed in knowledge in the image of its Creator. *Here there is no Greek or Jew, circumcised or uncircumcised, barbarian, Scythian, slave or free, but Christ is all, and is in all. *
Then Paul continues and tell us what kind of characteristics we are to have, things that the unsaved don't understand like forgiveness and doing all in the Name of the Lord:
Colossians 3:12–17 —Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. *Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. *And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity. *Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members of one body you were called to peace. And be thankful. *Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom, and as you sing psalms, hymns and spiritual songs with gratitude in your hearts to God. *And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him. *
So I hope these scriptures help you. What I've seen is that the more of Jesus people see in us, the more they hate us, but at the same time, the more likely a few of them will eventually want to know more about Him too.
Right now I am struggling with direction and purpose. It's hard to explain so that I feel others really "get it." I don't need to know everything God has in store for me. Or what His timetable is. But I feel like I need to take baby steps toward the future. But now sure what baby steps to take because well I don't really know what direction I'm supposed to go. Not sure how that related to the book of Job. Except that while God stripped Job of those things that create our identity in the world (his family, his job and wealth, possessions, his reputation, friends) he also restored both his
material goods and his relationship with God. And I know that He wants me to believe that He can make this next part of my life just as rich as the previous one
Amen! The Lord always brings good from what we go through, and use it to help us become more like Jesus. Like you, Job had nothing left in this world except for his relationship with God, and when that was enough, then God restored everything he'd lost and blessed the later part of his life even more then the first part.
Fearnot posted:
I like the sound of that, God blessed his later part of life more than his first!
Sounds good to me, as I am in my later part of life, and actually he has already blessed me more than the first part of my life.
jtheb posted: I share that experience.
Catt posted: I understand what you are saying Jackswife. I am in a similar place myself.
Cindy,
Your sure are right about the trouble that comes from having an unbeliever
for a boyfriend or a spouse. Not fun.
It sure can Catt and it's always a struggle and heartache because you want them to be saved so very much. I was blessed in that my husband was saved, in spite of my disobedience, but as the famous saying goes, if I'd known then, what I know now, as much as I love him, I wouldn't have married him till after he became saved. Thankfully our God is a forgiving God when we confess our sins, which of course I did.
I think there's another problem too that we often don't consider when we're "in love", and that's when the other person says they're a believer and saved, and they are, but they have let their relationship with God become cold. With what I've learned, now I'd want to make sure their relationship and mine with God was right before we considered having a relationship with each other. But back then, I had just been saved and didn't know much at all. I still thought like the world does and was always putting myself first and God second especially as far as "love" was concerned. I had all the usual excuses for it too.
I'm with all of you guys too in that the Lord's most certainly blessed this portion of my life more then the earlier part.
BTW, it's good to hear from you all!
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