Social Media and Digital Discernment

By John MacArthur

Twenty-five years ago Neil Postman observed that television had become an American “necessity” and lamented its effects on society. He correctly described the culture of the 1980s as one that was amusing itself to death. If he were alive today, Postman would be astonished at how quickly Twitter, Facebook, and other forms of social media have gripped our society. His earlier criticisms raise an interesting question about these current trends: If TV put our culture in the casket, has social media nailed the coffin shut?
Almost overnight, the budding world of social media has revolutionized the way our culture communicates. Even our vocabulary has been affected. Suddenly, people are “tagging” each other, “tweeting” about themselves, and “liking” everything they see. For the first time, it’s possible to have “friends” you’ve never even met. Those conversant in the language of social media rarely use complete sentences or even complete words (since they are limited to 140 characters). All the while, words like “screenager,” “vlog,” and “cyberslacking,” are finding their way into dictionaries like Oxford and Webster’s. It’s funny to consider that, not too long ago, surfing was just a water sport and a yahoo was a crazy person. But not anymore.
Social media is also changing the way people spend their time. Recent statistics from Nielson indicate that Americans spend 906 million hours per month using social media.¹ Twitter has over 100 million users. YouTube serves more than two billion videos a day. And Facebook reports that, worldwide, its 500 million active users spend a combined 700 billion minutes on the site each month. That’s roughly 24 hours per person, which is a lot of time to spend checking status updates and changing profile pictures.²
So what are Christians supposed to think about all of this? How can we exercise biblical discernment in the way we use this new media?
On the one hand, social networking websites provide numerous benefits and opportunities. Many of the ministries with which I am involved (like Grace to You and The Master’s College & Seminary) utilize social networking to dispense resources and keep people updated with ministry news.³ Social networking can be a useful tool when used to communicate the right things—messages that honor Christ, exalt His Word, and direct people to profitable tools for spiritual growth.
But social networking can also be abused. When it consists of nothing more than random babblings and personal monologues, it can become self-centered, unrestrained and narcissistic. When it consumes our lives, it can be addictive and controlling. Used unwisely, it is filled with potential pitfalls and temptations. For those who follow Christ, we are called to submit every area of our lives to His lordship—including how we use social media. With that in mind, let’s look at the following five areas of caution:

Virtual Fellowship

First, consider the façade of friendship that can be created by social networking. It has the potential to foster shallow relationships and detract from real ones. Instead of enhancing deep friendships, it tends to flatten out and impersonalize the dynamics of human interaction—creating what Umair Haque calls “thin relationships.” Writing for the Harvard Business Review, Haque notes, “Despite all the excitement surrounding social media, the Internet isn’t connecting us as much as we think it is. It’s largely home to weak, artificial connections, what I call thin relationships. . . . Thin relationships are the illusion of real relationships.” He goes on to explain that, thanks to the explosion of so-called friendships in the world of social networking, the very word “relationship” has lost its value. “It used to mean someone you could count on. Today, it means someone you can swap bits with.”⁴
Haque is not alone in his observations. Gervase Markham, a Mozilla Foundation programmer quoted inThe Sydney Morning Herald, echoes that same concern: “Social networking en-courages people to have a greater number of much shallower friendships. I know what 15 of my friends had for breakfast, but I don’t know whether any of them is struggling with major life issues. If this trend continues, people in 2020 will have hundreds of acquaintances, but very few friends.”⁵
Researcher Mark Vernon, writing in USA Today, agrees: “While social networking sites and the like have grown exponentially, the element that is crucial, and harder to investigate, is the quality of the connections they nurture. . . . A connection may only be a click away, but cultivating a good friendship takes more. It seems common sense to conclude that ‘friending’ online nurtures shallow relationships.”⁶ His advice for maintaining real friendships is simple: “Put down the device; engage the person.”⁷
Social networking gives the illusion of knowing everyone, and yet the reality is that oftentimes no one is truly known. It creates an environment where selfish, one-sided relationships seem to flourish, and where communication is largely unidirectional, made up of sound bites instead of deep interaction.
Moreover, it often distracts people from existing relationships. Instead of pouring themselves into the real-life friendships they currently have, people now spend hours with pseudo-friends online. This is especially seen within the family, where social networking constantly threatens to invade, bringing a barrage of cultural influence into the private world of family life. In the home, focused training in godliness is essential for the development of spiritually-healthy relationships and biblical worldviews. But instant distraction is only a text message away.
As believers, we are called to love, encourage, instruct, admonish, and serve one another. That requires far more than social media can provide. The life-on-life discipleship that characterizes Christian friendship goes much deeper than any Facebook update or Twitter post. In so far as our fellowship is limited to 140 characters of text, it is not true fellowship at all.

Every Careless Word

The book of Proverbs tells us that, “He who spreads slander is a fool. When there are many words, transgression is unavoidable, but he who restrains his lips is wise” (10:18b-19). A maxim for all of life, that statement certainly applies to social media.
Those who spread slander and gossip online can now find themselves in court.⁸ Some might be sued.⁹ Others simply fired from their jobs.¹⁰
But even if such potential consequences did not exist, Christians answer to a higher court. And God has made it clear what He thinks about gossip: “He who goes about as a slanderer reveals secrets, therefore do no associate with a gossip” (Prov. 20:19).
A study in the New York Daily News found that 80% of normal conversations consist of gossip.¹¹ Those numbers seem to be consistent with online interactions, where talking about other people is almost as popular as talking about oneself. In a helpful article entitled “Solomon on Social Media,” Tim Challies gives this timely warning: “There are many web sites, blogs and Twitter accounts dedicated almost entirely to gossip, to sharing what is dishonorable rather than what is noble. Avoid these people and their gossip!”¹²
But even beyond the world of slander, one has to wonder how many careless words are posted, texted, or tweeted every moment of the day. Statistics suggest that there are about 700 Facebook status updates and over 600 tweets every second.¹³ Even if some of those are profitable, that still leaves a lot of empty chatter.
Our Lord addressed this issue directly in His statement, “Every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it” (Matt. 12:36). That’s a sobering thought, especially when paired with the maxim of Proverbs 17:28: “Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.” (Many a young blogger would do well to memorize those verses.)
In 1 Corinthians 10:23–24, Paul explains an important principle about Christian liberty. He writes, “All things are lawful, but not all things are profitable. All things are lawful, but not all things edify. Let no one seek his own good, but that of his neighbor.” If we apply that truth to the world of social media, we can quickly separate that which is valuable from that which is merely wood, hay, and stubble. Tweeting about the inane details of life might not be sinful, but if it doesn’t build others up spiritually, it might be better left unsaid.

Time Mismanagement

According to recent statistics, the average American worker spends almost six hours a month visiting social networking websites during work time. The majority of that time is spent on Facebook.¹⁴
But this is not just about wasting time at work. It’s about wasting time, period. By its very nature, social networking is a massive distraction. It detracts from disciplined study, thoughtful meditation, and concerted prayer.
In a Time Magazine article entitled “It’s Time to Confront Your Facebook Addiction,” Kayla Webley shares some startling statistics. “One-third of women ages 18 to 34 check Facebook first thing in the morning. . . . Of the 1,605 adults surveyed on their social media habits, 39% are self-described ‘Facebook addicts.’ It gets worse. Fifty-seven percent of women in the 18 to 34 age range say they talk to people online more than they have face-to-face conversations. Another 21% admit to checking Facebook in the middle of the night.”¹⁵
Some Facebook “addicts,” like Maria Garcia of Philadelphia, spend as much as 56 hours a week on the site.¹⁶ Reporting on her story, ABC News recounted the concern of those in the medical community: “The popularity and social acceptance of networking sites is one of the reasons Dr. Joseph Garbley says Facebook addiction is becoming a very real problem. . . . Garbley says unlike alcohol or drugs, social networking addiction is psychological not physical. But he adds it is still a serious problem: ‘The problem comes in when life intercedes, when school work calls, when relationships demand your attention and you chose Facebook over those relationships.’”¹⁷ It seems social media sites have become the new soap operas!
Of course, the real problem is a heart issue, not a psychological one. But the point remains. For many Americans, the amount of time spent using social media is out of control. Whether defined as “addicts” or not, people spend vast amounts of time browsing blogs, watching YouTube videos, reading tweets, and managing their profiles. We’ve already noted that, on average, the active Facebook user spends nearly 24 hours a month on the site. In September 2010, the amount of time spent on Facebook surpassed Google for the first time. Combine this with time spent blogging, micro-blogging, commenting, texting, instant messaging, and surfing—and the sheer hours represented become staggering.
Ironically, people can spend hours jumping from link to link without even realizing how much time they are wasting. As author Ivan Misner explains in Business Week, “You go to LinkedIn or Facebook and you read a comment and it takes you to another link and now you’re on YouTube, watching someone’s video. Pretty soon something weird happens in the space-time continuum and you look up and you’ve lost two hours.”¹⁸
As believers, the command of Ephesians 5:15–16 is just as binding upon our modern lives as it was in the non-technological world of the first century. “Therefore be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.” Paul’s exhortation has massive implications for how we interact with social media. One day we will stand before Christ to give an account for how we used His resources (including our time and energy). With that in mind, how much of this life can be justifiably devoted to Twitter, Facebook, YouTube and the like? Just a few hours each day, over the course of a lifetime, adds up to years of wasted opportunity.

Putting the ME in Media

If there is one word that perhaps best describes social media it is this: self-promotion. The narcissism fostered by status updates and tweets is undeniable. And cultural critics have taken notice.
Some respond with humor.¹⁹ A few see it as a good thing.²⁰ Others are concerned that social media is ramping up society’s psychological maladies—like Narcissistic Personality Disorder.²¹ (Of course, what psychologists label “NPD” the Bible calls the sin of pride.)
Even the majority of social media users admit that self-promotion is at its core: “A national study fresh out of SDSU is confirming that Generation Y really is Generation Me. The jaw-dropping conclusion? 57% of young people believe their generation uses social networking sites for self-promotion, narcissism and attention seeking.”²² In the words of one British journalist: “The Me-Man is everywhere. And so is the Me-Woman. They are the millions of men and women . . . from every class, age and profession who want to talk about themselves, expose themselves, and promote themselves in glorious and often gory detail. . . . They blog and bleat and tweet and text you all the time. The medium may vary, but the message is always the same: Me. ‘Me, Me, Me!’”²³
Dr. Lauren LaPorta, Chairman of the Department of Psychiatry at St. Joseph’s, sees the popularity of social networking sites as a direct result of the growing narcissism in American culture (due largely to the self-esteem movement of the 90s). Writing for the Psychiatric Times, she observes, “It is my contention that these sites would not have risen to such prominence but for the fact that a generation of narcissists needed an outlet. The millennial generation needed a way to assert their uniqueness, their specialness and garner the attention and praise of the masses. Facebook, MySpace, YouTube and Twitter filled the bill.”²⁴
But the me-centered world of social media is clearly at odds with the biblical call to humility and selflessness. Consider just a brief sampling of relevant Scripture passages on this subject:

Proverbs 16:18—“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before stumbling.”
Proverbs 27:2—“Let another man praise you and not your own mouth; a stranger, and not your own lips.”
Proverbs 30:2—“If you have been foolish in exalting yourself . . . put your hand over your mouth.”
Isaiah 66:2—“‘To this one I [the LORD] will look, to him who is humble and contrite of spirit, and who trembles at My word.’”
Matthew 23:11–12—“The greatest among you shall be your servant. Whoever exalts himself shall be humbled; and whoever humbles himself shall be exalted.”
Philippians 2:3–5—“Do nothing from selfishness or empty conceit, but with humility of mind regard one another as more important than yourselves. . . . Have this attitude in yourselves which was also in Christ Jesus.”

To these, a host of other passages could be added. All of them make the same point: God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.
When so much about social media panders to pride and shameless self-exaltation, believers need to think about their motives before they jump on the bandwagon. If the goal is simply popularity or personal promotion, it’s time to do a heart check. Our celebrity-driven culture craves for notoriety. But Christians are called to be different. We have died to ourselves. Thus, our concern should not be, “How many people can I get to follow me?” but rather, “How can I bear witness to the wonder of following Christ?”

Trivializing Truth

None other than National Public Radio recently lamented the growing trivialization of values in American society. In an NPR web article entitled, "Trivialization Nation” (Feb. 2010) Linton Weeks writes, “The wide-spread trivialization of meaningful things is indisputable. Sound bites and silliness reign supreme. . . . Perhaps the tendency to trivialize is born of band-wagonism or laziness. . . . Trivializing large ideals is easier than living up to them. And it’s less scary.”²⁵
Elsewhere, the article cited an interview with the president of Harvard, Drew Faust, in which she was asked to respond to the dumbing down of American culture. “I worry about attention span,” Faust said, “because people will not listen to more than a couple of sentences or read more than a couple of sentences. Does everything have to be a sound bite? Is everything to be digested into something brief? And aren’t there complicated ideas that we ought to have the patience to give our attention to?"²⁶
One novelist-turned-blogger provides firsthand testimony of that trivialization in his own experience. He writes: “This is, I think, the real danger of social media and Twitter. . . . It changes the way I process information. Or to be more precise, I no longer process information—I merely consume it. I speed read hundreds of bits of articles a day, absorbing lots of information, but rarely actually thinking about it. . . . The difficult thoughts, the ambivalent thoughts, the repulsive thoughts, the thoughts too complicated to be reduced to a tweet. They are labeled low priority and sent to the back office of my mind.”²⁷
Geoff Dyer, writing in The Guardian, echoes that concern: “Sometimes I think my ability to concentrate is being nibbled away by the internet; other times I think it’s being gulped down in huge, Jaws-shaped chunks.”²⁸ A CNBC article entitled, “Is Twitter Making You Stupid?” concludes with this sobering assessment: “It seems that we’ve managed, in the words of playwright Richard Foreman . . . to transform ourselves into ‘pancake people’—spread wide and thin as we connect with that vast network of information accessed by the mere touch of a button.”²⁹
While scientists and social critics debate the effects of social media on how we think, one thing remains clear: Christians must guard themselves against becoming theological pancakes. Thanks to the market-driven methodologies of the seeker-sensitive movement, the dumbing down of doctrine has characterized American evangelicalism for decades. In many ways, sites like Twitter and Facebook only exacerbate that problem because they provide a venue in which reductionism and extreme brevity simultaneously coincide with information overload and infinite distraction.
But not every theological truth can be adequately summarized in just a phrase or two. And not every debate can be resolved in just one blog article. Many doctrines require extended time and thought to properly process. Mature believers reflect deeply on the things of God and the truths of His Word.
They are not a mile wide and an inch deep. Instead their lives are marked by rich devotion, focused study, prolonged prayer, and careful mediation. Cultivating those kinds of spiritual disciplines takes time and effort—traits that are rarely prized in the information age.
In light of that, believers must not allow blogs, tweets, and status updates to become their primary source of theological education or spiritual input. If they do, they will inevitably become doctrinally shallow and spiritually malnourished.
God’s Word repeatedly calls us to use our minds wisely. We are to think on things that are right and true (Phil. 4:8) as we test all things carefully (1 Thess. 5:21) and bring every thought captive to the obedience of Christ (2 Cor. 10:5). Our minds are to be renewed (Rom. 12:2) as we allow the Word of Christ to dwell in us richly (Col. 3:16). We are to be sober-minded (1 Cor. 15:34) as we set our minds on things above (Col. 3:2) and prepare them for action (1 Pet. 1:13).
Clearly, God cares how we think and what we think about. Insofar as social media websites cultivate the trivialization of profound truths, while simultaneously fostering shorter attention spans, believers would do well to proceed carefully.

Something to Think About

At this point it is important to reiterate what I said at the beginning. Social networking can be a useful tool when it is used in moderation and for the right things. At the same time, however, pitfalls and temptations do exist; and believers need to arm themselves accordingly. Social media are obviously not going away any time soon. But that doesn’t mean we can be undiscerning in how we approach them.
For me, as a pastor, this issue is particularly important from a shepherding perspective. Christian leaders are called to equip their people to think through every area of life with biblical wisdom. And this is no exception.
Moreover, believers (and especially pastors) need to be careful what they communicate to the world about their lives. Once something is posted online it can be seen by anyone else. Once it’s cached, there is a permanent record of it. That means every status update and every tweet is part of the believer’s public testimony as a Christian.
As Paul told the Galatians, “I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me” (2:20). Like Paul and every other believer, my life is no longer my own. The focus must not be on me, but on Christ. When someone hears from me publicly, I want it all to point to Him.
NOTES:

* Special thanks to members of the Grace Church staff for helping to find these online sources.
* The citation of sources here does not imply blanket endorsement of these websites or authors.

1 http://blog.nielsen.com/nielsenwire/online_mobile/what-americans-do-online-social-media-and-games-dominate-activity/
2 http://www.facebook.com/press/info.php?statistics
3 In my case, our staff at Grace to You maintains a social media presence for me (on both Facebook and Twitter) in order to direct people to biblical teaching resources. Though I am not personally involved in posting anything to Facebook or Twitter, I do see the value of those sites for ministry purposes.
4 http://blogs.hbr.org/haque/2010/03/the_social_media_bubble.html
5 http://www.smh.com.au/technology/social-media-making-us-shallow-20100706-zy5u.html
6 http://www.usatoday.com/news/opinion/forum/2010-07-27-column27_ST_N.htm
7 Ibid.
8 http://www.nytimes.com/2010/06/01/us/01slapp.html?_r=1&ref=libel_and_slander
9 http://legalblogwatch.typepad.com/legal_blog_watch/2009/05/legal-consequences-of-social-media.html
10 http://www.abajournal.com/news/article/slander_or_satire_when_does_social_media_cross_ legal_lines/
11 http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/health/2009/09/10/2009-09
10_gossip_makes_up_80_percent_of_our_conversations__and_that_might_be_ok_experts.html
12 http://www.challies.com/christian-living/solomon-on-social-media
13 http://searchengineland.com/by-the-numbers-twitter-vs-facebook-vs-google-buzz-36709; for more recent numbers on Twitter see http://mashable.com/2010/06/25/tps-record/
14 http://en-us.nielsen.com/content/nielsen/en_us/news/news_releases/2010/june/nielsen_and_mckinsey.html
15 http://newsfeed.time.com/2010/07/08/its-time-to-confront-your-facebook-addiction/
16 http://abclocal.go.com/wpvi/story?section=news/special_reports&id=7251938
17 Ibid.
18 http://www.businessweek.com/smallbiz/content/jun2010/sb2010068_630402.htm
19 http://www.despair.com/somevedi.html
20 http://corymiller.com/why-narcissism-is-necessary-on-twitter/
21 http://socialmediarockstar.com/why-narcissistic-personality-disorder-loves-social-media
22 http://mashable.com/2009/08/25/gen-y-social-media-study/; see alsohttp://www.usatoday.com/news/education/2009-08-24-narcissism-young_N.htm
23 http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1278968/From-YouTube-Facebook-Welcome-agenarcissism.html?printingPage=true
24 http://www.psychiatrictimes.com/news/content/article/10168/1514386
25 http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=123568025
26 Ibid.
27 http://themanwhofellasleep.wordpress.com/2010/10/13/social-media-and-digital-narcissism/
28 http://www.guardian.co.uk/technology/2010/aug/15/internet-brain-neuroscience-debate
29 http://www.cnbc.com/id/32569284/Is_Twitter_Making_You_Stupid/

http://www.gty.org/blog/B101110/social-media-and-digital-discernment
 

The Downfall of Babylon & The World Today

1. I've been studying Revelation again and began studying about Babylon and it's destruction in Rev 18, and why God destroyed it. I wanted to know what the sins were that God hated so much, because I knew that those same sins must be present in our time too. I'm sure they've always been present, but felt they must be even worse in our time since everything seems to be so much worse now and we've been seeing so many previews of all the judgments that will be coming during the tribulation.
   
   What I found both did and didn't surprise me. I guess the part that surprised me was because it's something the Lord has been teaching me about lately anyway. (He often seems to point out things He's teaching me personally during my study time lol) This time one of the main things was about idolatry. The Lord's been teaching me about the sin of idolatry for almost 2 years now, and I've discovered that it's much much more then just bowing down to some statue.
   
   I think it would be safe to say that most of us would never think idolatry would be a problem for any of us. After all, we do worship the one true God, so we're safe, right? Wrong. The Lord's shown me so much about this sin, that it's mind boggling to me. I've learned since I wrote that first piece that idolatry is very much a sin that's familiar to all of us. This is the sin that's going to continue to grow until it's so ugly and monstrous that it should be obvious to all what a horrid sin it is.
   
   One of the first ways I learned to define idolatry, besides bowing to a statue, was that it means putting anything before God and His Word. Most of us would instantly say that we would never do that, and we'd mean it too. But the Lord's shown me how insidious this sin is, and that in fact, most of us are guilty of it and not just once in a while. Yet another definition of idolatry is thinking anything about God that isn't true or trying to make Him something He isn't. It's something God also calls Spiritual adultery. If you think about it, God often accuses Israel of spiritual adultery in the OT, and He warns us from that in the NT too. But what is spiritual adultery? It's when we become involved in false teachings and things like that. It is NOT when we mistakenly believe something that's not true, because we haven't gotten to that truth yet in our daily studies with Him. But, if we hold to a false teaching, and do not study His Word with Him daily, then He does hold us responsible and does call it spiritual adultery and idolatry, because if we had, we would have known the truth.
   
   Knowing this then, and knowing the state of the Church right now, seeing the direction it's going, it's easy to see how this sin is going to continue to grow. There will be no great revival to bring people back to the truth, like the false teachers say, before the rapture. So this is just going to get worse and worse. Then, after the rapture, although there will be a tremendous and great soul harvest during the tribulation, with many saved who know and live the Truth, this sin will continue to grow in the majority of mankind as they basically worship themselves as god, and/or the god they create in their one world religion.
   
   This is one part of the sin of idolatry that will be practiced by the harlot, the woman riding the beast. Remember that she's dressed in purple, and gold and precious gems and jewels, showing luxury. This shows us the other part of the sin of idolatry practiced by her and all who follow her. (the one world religion). Remember how Jesus told us that the love of money was the root of all evil? This is another aspect of idolatry. It's when the love of pleasures or possessions becomes the most important thing in our lives. And this will be very true of the people during the tribulation.
   
   In fact though, it's already true of the majority of the world, even of Christians. This was the hard one for me to learn about. At first I denied that I could possibly be guilty of this. After all, I don't have much money anyway! Think though of how Satan, the prince of the air, has used the media to encourage this sin in our lives. People were much more content with their lives (like God tells us to be) before radio and especially before TV! They weren't being constantly barraged with pictures and sounds of the "new, improved, and better" things they could have like we are. No matter what we own, we constantly see commercials for the same thing only the next model up that's newer, prettier, improved, better, etc. And of course, everyone wants it! Somehow, you lose your desire for the one you've got, and find that you just have to have the newer, better kind.
   
   I think back to my parents childhood, then mine, my children's and now my grandchildren's and it's so very different! Now days, kids have things that many people didn't get until they were adults, if then! The US prides itself on being so prosperous, but what we are is idolatrous, not prosperous and it's getting worse every day.
   
   Let me quote something from one of the commentaries about the verses describing the downfall of Babylon and the sins she's judged for, and see if it doesn't sound an awful lot like how it is today:
   
   A third sin is Babylon’s worship of pleasures and luxury. To “live deliciously” (Rev. 18:7) is to live proudly in luxury while others go without. It means to make possessions and pleasures the most important things in life, and to ignore the needs of others. John summarized this attitude as “the lust of the flesh, and the lust of the eyes, and the pride of life” (1 John 2:16). The world system satisfies the desires of the earth-dwellers who follow “the beast” and reject the Lamb. But worldly things never permanently satisfy or last. The love of pleasures and possessions is but an insidious form of idolatry, demonic in its origin and destructive in its outcome. The Bible exposition commentary.
   
   Babylon’s sins ‎(18:3). The verse links spiritual adultery (idolatry) with “excessive luxuries.” A focus on material things leads not only to self-indulgence but also to an arrogance which denies any need for God. The worldly person puts his or her hope in possessions and in this sense puts things in the place rightly occupied by God. Idolatry is not just bowing down to images; it is also relying on wealth or power rather than on the Lord. The Bible reader’s companion
   
   When we need something, how often is our first thought of how much money we have...do we have enough to buy what we need or want? Do we have enough to see the doctor or pay for those tests? Do we think of things like that or think of how we might be able to make the money before we ever think of God who is our real provider?
   
   I've found that the twin to this is the sin of self idolatry because we often rely on ourselves long before we turn to God. We save God for the things we can't do for ourselves. At least most of us do until we learn better. When I first heard the term, "self idolatry", I thought it meant worshiping myself, and again figured I was safe. But that's not quite it is it? It's when we rely on ourselves instead of God, and that's already something just about everyone's guilty of in our time, and again is only going to get worse.
   
   Note too how idolatry is linked to Satan and the demonic. It's easy to see in God's Word how the love of pleasure and possessions soon draws demons into our lives. So many warnings against getting caught up in it, both in the old and new testaments. Now we know why. And look how all these forms of idolatry are growing tremendously, and right along side them, so is the occult and new age trash, and the false teachings like the prosperity gospel! It's all nothing more then idolatry.
   
   Suddenly, Babylon was looking awfully familiar! I wrote about it when God first started teaching me about idolatry and what it really was, I used to think that I couldn't ever be an idolater... thinking I'd learned my lesson. I had no idea there was so much more to learn!  I see now that much of what we consider normal in life is nothing more then idolatry. God wants to be involved in every part of our lives. He wants to be a constant part of our lives... of every thought, every action. He's not interested in being a part time God or a genie when we want something. That was one of the things that impressed me in studying Leviticus. His laws were made so that the Israelites were forced to make him part of everything they did, and that was the point. When I think back to the first Christians, that's how they lived too, especially since they knew that at any moment they could be arrested and/or killed for their faith, and also believed that at any moment Jesus could return. In reading Revelation, I realized that's how the tribulation saints will also live, except they'll know almost exactly when Jesus will be returning. Neither group makes us look very good does it? I have to admit it really makes me ashamed of myself. It makes me want desperately to live only for Him, to make Him proud of me. I want to heed His call to come out of her, don't you? I'd like to end with what one of my commentaries says about Rev 18:
   
   Our American society increasingly has traits in common with Babylon: materialism, a passion for luxury, and growing immorality especially reflected in movies, literature, and contemporary music. Our society too will share Babylon’s judgment—perhaps before Christ comes. Let’s make sure our allegiance to Christ is so strong that when our Babylon crumbles we will have grace to rejoice. The Bible reader’s companion

God's Sufficient Grace

God's Sufficient Grace

by John MacArthur

A certain poor man spent many years saving money to realize his dream of going on a cruise. When he finally saved the required sum, he bought a ticket. Knowing he could not afford the extravagant food on board, he took what he could afford—crackers and peanut butter.

After a few days of observing the other passengers eating luxurious meals, his peanut butter crackers became stale and tasteless. Desperately hungry, he begged a porter to allow him to work for food.

“Why, sir, didn’t you realize meals are included with your ticket? You may eat as much as you like!”

Lots of Christians live like that man. Not realizing the unlimited provisions that are theirs in Christ, they munch on stale scraps. There’s no need to live like that! Everything we could ever want or need is included in the cost of admission—and the Savior has already paid it for us!

There’s a single word that encompasses all the riches we find in Christ: grace. What a magnificent word it is! It is used more than 150 times in the New Testament to speak of divine favor bestowed on undeserving people. It is the means by which we receive every physical and spiritual benefit.

To some measure even unbelievers benefit from God’s grace. Theologians call that “common grace” because it is common to all mankind. Common grace is God’s continual care for all creation, providing for his creatures’ needs. Through common grace God restrains humanity from utter debauchery and maintains order and some sense of beauty, morality, and goodness in society’s consciousness.

Christians, however, receive a greater grace (James 4:6). To us God’s grace is inexhaustible and boundless, including all that we have talked in earlier posts about regarding the all-sufficient provisions of Jesus Christ.

We are saved by grace (Ephesians 2:8) and in grace we stand (Romans 5:2). Grace upholds our salvation, gives us victory in temptation, and helps us endure suffering and pain. It helps us understand the Word and wisely apply it to our lives. It draws us into communion and prayer and enables us to serve the Lord effectively. In short, we exist and are firmly fixed in an environment of all-sufficient grace.

Grace upon Grace

One of the most wonderful statements about our Lord is that He was “full of grace” (John 1:14) and “of His fullness we have all received, and grace upon grace” (John 1:16). “Grace upon grace” speaks of accumulated grace—one grace following upon another. Such grace is ours each day. It is unlimited and sufficient for every need.

Paul called it “the abundance of grace” (Romans 5:17), “the riches of [God’s] grace” (Ephesians 2:7), and “surpassing grace” (2 Corinthians 9:14). Peter called it the “manifold” (in Greek, poikilos, “multifaceted” or “multicolored”) grace of God (1 Peter 4:10). He used the same Greek word in 1 Peter 1:6 with reference to the various trials believers face. That’s a wonderful parallel: God’s multifaceted grace is sufficient for our multifaceted trials.

Super-Abounding Grace

Perhaps nowhere is the magnificence of grace more wonderfully stated than in 2 Corinthians 9:8–11. The superlatives here are staggering: “God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything, you may have an abundance for every good deed.… You will be enriched in everything for all liberality, which through us is producing thanksgiving to God” (emphasis added).

In a sense, those two verses sum up everything that could ever be said about our sufficiency in Christ. Set in a context describing God’s material provision, they have meaning that obviously extends to limitless proportions. Surpassing grace indwells every believer (v. 14). Is it any wonder Paul could not restrain his praise to God for such an indescribable gift (v. 15)?

All-Sufficient Grace

Paul experienced God’s grace as few others have because he endured suffering as few others have. In 2 Corinthians 12:9 the Lord gave him one of the most profound truths in all revelation: “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” That wonderful promise extends to every believer, but its context is one of severe difficulties, distresses, persecutions, and human weaknesses (v. 10).

In chapter 11 Paul chronicles many of the hardships and life-threatening situations he had endured. Included in his list are great physical trials—imprisonments, beatings, stonings, shipwrecks, dangerous rivers, robbers, Jewish and Gentile persecutions, sleepless nights, inclement weather, and lack of food and drink (vv. 23–27). More painful than all that was the daily concern he had for all the churches (v. 28). God’s people and His church were Paul’s greatest passion (Colossians 1:28–29) and presented the highest potential for pain and disappointment.

The greatest pain he ever knew came from some of the people he loved the most—those to whom he had given his soul and his gospel, but who now had turned against him. Their rejection, betrayal, criticism, false accusations, and even hatred cut deep into his heart. In 2 Corinthians he wrote as a man who was unloved, unappreciated, distrusted, and deeply troubled in his soul.

The Lessons of Grace

Paul’s distressing circumstances put him in a position to learn some marvelous lessons about God’s grace, which he passes on to us in 2 Corinthians 12:7–10:

Because of the surpassing greatness of the revelations, for this reason, to keep me from exalting myself, there was given me a thorn in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me—to keep me from exalting myself! Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave from me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.

There is so much to be drawn from this marvelous text. For the purpose of this post I’ll simply make brief mention of the lessons we can draw regarding God’s grace.

Humility. God knows that men are prone toward pride, especially when they are in positions of spiritual privilege. Therefore He often uses opposition and suffering to teach them humility. That God places trials in our lives to restrain our sin and produce godliness is an act of grace.

Dependence. Often other believers are channels of God’s grace, but He alone is its source. We tend to turn to people with our hurts, but God wants us to look to Him first of all in times of trouble.

Three times Paul appealed to God to remove the thorn—three times the Lord said no. He prayed persistently and faithfully, yet he learned that God’s purposes could be better accomplished by the answer no.

Sufficiency. Paul was content with God’s decision because he knew that God would supply sufficient grace for his trial. “He has said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you’ ” (v. 9). “He has said” is in the perfect tense in the Greek text, implying that every time Paul prayed, God said the same thing and kept on saying it. “My grace is sufficient for you” was his standing answer. After three times, Paul dropped the request. This was not a sign that Paul gave up on God, but that he rested in God’s sufficient grace.

Power. The same suffering that reveals our weaknesses reveals God’s strength, “for power is perfected in weakness” (v. 9). When we are least effective in our human strength and have only God’s power to sustain us, then we are suitable channels through which His power flows. And so we should praise God for adversity because that’s when His power is most evident in our lives. There is no one too weak to be powerful, but there are many too strong.

Contentment. Paul gives us a key principle in verse 10: “Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” Paul embraced his deepest trouble as a friend to lead him to greater spiritual usefulness.

Conclusion

God’s grace is more than sufficient for your every need. Is your relationship with Him deep and trusting enough to draw you to Him during times of difficulty? Are you content to endure weaknesses, insults, distresses, and persecutions for Christ’s sake so that you can be spiritually strong even amid physical and emotional weakness?

The story is told of Charles Haddon Spurgeon, who was riding home one evening after a heavy day’s work, feeling weary and depressed, when the verse came to mind, “My grace is sufficient for you.”

In his mind he immediately compared himself to a little fish in the Thames River, apprehensive lest drinking so many pints of water in the river each day he might drink the Thames dry. Then Father Thames says to him, “Drink away, little fish. My stream is sufficient for you.”

Next he thought of a little mouse in the granaries of Egypt, afraid lest its daily nibbles exhaust the supplies and cause it to starve to death. Then Joseph comes along and says, “Cheer up, little mouse. My granaries are sufficient for you.”

Then he thought of a man climbing some high mountain to reach its lofty summit and dreading lest his breathing there might exhaust all the oxygen in the atmosphere. The Creator booms His voice out of heaven, saying, “Breathe away, oh man, and fill your lungs. My atmosphere is sufficient for you!”

Let us rest in the abundance of God’s wonderful grace and the total sufficiency of all His spiritual resources. That’s the all-sufficient Savior’s legacy to His people.

“May grace and peace be yours in fullest measure” (1 Peter 1:2)!

See previous parts of this series: Contaminated Cures for Soul Care;

 Insufficient Help, Part 1;  Insufficient Help, Part 2;

God's Sufficient Word, Part 1; God's Sufficient Word, Part 2;

God's Sufficient Spirit;

Posted with permission:

http://www.gty.org/blog/B140919/gods-sufficient-grace

 

God's Sufficient Spirit

God's Sufficient Spirit

The book titled I’m Dysfunctional, You’re Dysfunctional, by Wendy Kaminer, debunked much of the mystique of modern psychology.[1] The author did not purport to be a Christian. In fact, she described herself as “a skeptical, secular humanist, Jewish, feminist, intellectual lawyer.”[2]

Yet she wrote as a bitter critic of the marriage of religion and psychology. She noted that religion and psychology have always more or less deemed one another incompatible. Now she sees “not just a truce but a remarkable accommodation.”[3] Even from her perspective as an unbeliever, she could see that this accommodation has meant a change in the fundamental message Christians convey to the world. She wrote:

Religious writers would minimize or dismiss the effect of psychology on religion, fiercely denying that it has made doctrinal changes, but it does seem to have influenced the tone and packaging of religious appeals... Christian codependency books, like those produced by the Minirth-Meier clinic in Texas, are practically indistinguishable from codependency books published by secular writers... Religious writers justify their reliance on psychology by praising it for “catching up” to some eternal truths, but they’ve also found a way to make the temporal truths of psychology palatable.[4]

Some of the criticism Kaminer leveled against evangelicals is unwarranted or misguided, but in this respect she is right on target: Evangelicalism has been infiltrated by a worldly anthropology-psychology-theology that is diametrically opposed to the biblical doctrines of sin and sanctification. As a result of this accommodation, the church has compromised and hopelessly muddled the message it is to proclaim.

Psychology and worldly therapies have usurped the role of sanctification in some Christians’ thinking. Psychological sanctification has become a substitute for the Spirit-filled life.

But can psychotherapy possibly accomplish something that the Holy Spirit cannot? Can an earthly therapist achieve more than a heavenly Comforter? Is behavior modification more helpful than sanctification? Of course not.

The Paraclete

To understand the crucial role the Holy Spirit plays in meeting people’s inner needs, we must go back to what Jesus taught His disciples when He first promised them He would send the Holy Spirit. It happened on the night Jesus was betrayed. His crucifixion was drawing near, and the disciples were fearful and confused. When Jesus spoke to them about going away, their hearts were troubled (John 14:1). In that hour of turmoil, they feared being left alone. But Jesus assured them that they would not be left to fend for themselves. He comforted them with this wonderful promise:

I will ask the Father, and He will give you another Helper, that He may be with you forever; that is the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it does not see Him or know Him, but you know Him because He abides with you and will be in you. (John 14:16–17)

“Helper” in verse 16 is the Greek word paraklētos, meaning someone called to another’s aid. First John 2:1 applies the same term to Jesus Himself: “If anyone sins, we have an Advocate [paraklētos] with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous.” The word is sometimes transliterated into English as “paraclete.”

It describes a spiritual attendant whose role is to offer assistance, succor, support, relief, advocacy, and guidance—a divine Counselor whose ministry to believers is to offer the very things that so many people vainly seek in therapy!

The promises Jesus made with regard to the Holy Spirit and His ministry are staggering in their scope. Let’s look at some of the key elements of this text.

A Divine Helper

The word translated “another” (allos) is a key to understanding the nature of the Holy Spirit. The Greek text carries a precision that is not immediately evident in English. The word means “another of the same kind,” as in, “That cookie was tasty; may I have another?”

In using this word, Jesus describes the Holy Spirit as “another [allos] Helper [of the same kind].” He was promising to send His disciples a Helper exactly like Himself—a compassionate, loving, divine Paraclete. They had grown dependent on Jesus’ ministry to them. He had been their Wonderful Counselor, Teacher, Leader, Friend, and had shown them the Father. But from now on, they would have another Paraclete, One like Jesus, to meet the same needs He had met.

Here, for the first time, Jesus gave the disciples extensive teaching about the Holy Spirit and His role. Note that our Lord spoke of the Spirit as a person, not an influence, not a mystical power, not some ethereal, impersonal, phantom force. The Spirit has all the attributes of personality (mind, Romans 8:27; emotions, Ephesians 4:30; and will, Hebrews 2:4) and all the attributes of deity (see Acts 5:3–4). He is another Paraclete of exactly the same essence as Jesus.

There was, however, a significant difference: Jesus was returning to the Father, but the Holy Spirit would “be with you forever” (John 14:16). The Holy Spirit is a constant, sure, trustworthy, divine Paraclete graciously given by Christ to His disciples to be with them forever.

A Guide to Truth

It is noteworthy that Jesus referred to the Holy Spirit as “the Spirit of truth” (v. 17). As God, He is the essence of truth; as a Paraclete, He is the One who guides us into truth. That is why apart from Him, it is impossible for sinful beings to know or understand any spiritual truth.

Jesus said, “The world cannot receive [Him], because it does not see Him or know Him” (v. 17). Echoing that truth, Paul wrote:

To us God revealed [things which the world cannot see or understand] through the Spirit... Now we have received, not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit who is from God, so that we might know the things freely given to us by God... But a natural man does not accept the things of the Spirit of God; for they are foolishness to him; and he cannot understand them, because they are spiritually appraised. (1 Cor. 2:10, 12, 14)

Believers are actually taught spiritual truth by God Himself (see John 6:45). In fact, much of the Holy Spirit’s ministry to believers involves teaching them (John 14:26; 1 Corinthians 2:13; 1 John 2:20, 27); guiding them into the truth of Christ (John 16:13–14); and illuminating the truth for them (1 Corinthians 2:12).

After Jesus ascended to heaven, one of the crucial ministries of the Holy Spirit was to bring to the disciples’ minds what Jesus had said and to teach them what He meant: “These things I have spoken to you while abiding with you. But the Helper, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in My name, He will teach you all things, and bring to your remembrance all that I said to you” (John 14:25–26).

That means that the Holy Spirit enabled the disciples to recall the precise words Jesus had spoken to them, so that when they recorded them as Scripture, the words were perfect and error free. This assured that the gospel accounts were recorded infallibly, and that the apostolic teaching was unadulterated.

But this promise of our Lord also reveals the Holy Spirit as a supernatural Teacher who ministers truth to the hearts of those whom He indwells. The Spirit guides us into the truth of God’s Word. He teaches us, affirms the truth in our hearts, convicts us of sin, and often brings to mind specific truths and statements of Scripture that are applicable to our lives.

The Indwelling Presence

Look a little more closely at Jesus’ words at the end of John 14:17: “He abides with you and will be in you.” Our Lord was promising that the Holy Spirit would take up permanent, uninterrupted residence within His disciples. It was not only that the Spirit would be present with them; the greater truth was that He would be resident within them permanently.

This promise was not limited to the eleven apostles who were present that night. The Holy Spirit indwells every Christian. In verse 23, Jesus said, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word; and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our abode with him” (emphasis added). Paul, writing to the Corinthians, said, “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and that you are not your own?” (1 Corinthians 6:19). Thus each believer enjoys the permanent, continuing presence of the Holy Spirit living within.

The Holy Spirit in Biblical Counseling

The new birth is the Holy Spirit’s sovereign work (John 3:8). And every aspect of true spiritual growth in the life of the believer is prompted by the Spirit, using the truth of Scripture (17:17). The counselor who misses that point will experience failure, frustration, and discouragement.

Only the Holy Spirit can work fundamental changes in the human heart. Therefore, the Holy Spirit is the necessary agent in all effective biblical counseling. The counselor, armed with biblical truth, can offer objective guidance and steps for change. But unless the Holy Spirit is working in the heart of the counselee, any apparent change will be illusory, superficial, or temporary, and the same problems or worse ones will soon appear.

Conclusion

It is futile to follow the path of psychology and look within ourselves to find answers to our problems. And it is certainly true that those who focus on themselves, their childhood traumas, their wounded feelings, their emotional cravings, or other egocentric sources will never find genuine answers to their troubles.

The true believer, however, does have a Helper who dwells within. He is the Holy Spirit, who applies the objective truth of Scripture in the process of sanctification. Yet even He does not draw our attention inward, or to Himself. Instead, He directs our focus upward, to Christ. Jesus said, “When the Helper comes, whom I will send to you from the Father, that is the Spirit of truth who proceeds from the Father, He will testify of Me” (15:26).

Ultimately, it is unto Christ that the counselee’s focus must be directed. “Beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, [we] are being transformed into the same image from glory to glory, just as from the Lord, the Spirit” (2 Corithians 3:18). That is the process of sanctification. And it is the ultimate goal of all truly biblical counseling.

Posted with permission

http://www.gty.org/blog/B140917/gods-sufficient-spirit

See previous parts of this series: Contaminated Cures for Soul Care;

 Insufficient Help, Part 1;  Insufficient Help, Part 2;

God's Sufficient Word, Part 1; God's Sufficient Word, Part 2

Ezra is all about today too!

Boy, for such a short book, the Lord sure packs a whole lot into Ezra! I've learned so much studying it, and got so involved today, especially knowing I was close to the end, that I just couldn't stop. It really hits home hard though, especially considering what's going on in our day. It's like it was written just for our time. (which of course it was, but it was also written for all believers in all times lol)

Ezra brings the second group of people back to Jerusalem from Babylon, and once they arrive, he discovers that the people who came back in the first wave, have already broken the covenant with God! Worse, they broke it for one of the very same sins that they'd been sent into exile for! Of course that really shook him up, as it should have. Seeing him so shaken by the news, caused others to realize just how awful this sin was and they too became heart sick about it.

What really got to me about this though, is the sin itself, because it's something that happens all the time. The Jew's had once again intermarried with the pagans around them and had even had children with their new wives. Remember, God had specifically forbidden them from any intermarriage with anyone who didn't also worship Him and obey His law. It wasn't about race, or anything else, it was about Him. They were free to marry anyone of another race or culture as long as that person had totally and wholeheartedly committed themselves to Him first. But these folks hadn't done that. They'd married pagan women who still worshiped their pagan gods. Even some of the priests had done this and God's laws for who they could marry were even stricter, in order to keep them pure in their devotion to Him.

I can't even imagine being in Ezra's shoes at that point. He was the leader and he was going to have to confront them with their sin. It's horrible to have to tell someone you care about that they're sinning against God, because the vast majority of people haven't grown to a point where they can simply accept rebuke or correction, no matter how gently done, without getting really angry and going off in a huff, adding more sin to the one they were being rebuked about. I absolutely dread it when the Lord lets me know that it's something I need to do and tend to put it off as long as humanly possible, hoping to get out of it I suppose.

Poor Ezra had to tell the entire community though. Maybe because they saw how heartbroken and upset he was about it, or maybe the Lord sent His Spirit into their hearts to convict them, but for some reason the people actually supported what Ezra said. Well, all but 4 of them did anyway. That just goes to show us though that there's always bound to be some who won't want to hear what God thinks about something, especially if it means they have to change.

The vast majority though, confessed their sin and repented of it by divorcing their foreign wives and sending them and the children by them away. (I'm sure they provided for them financially first though)

Considering how much sin is going on freely in the Church these days though, can you imagine what would happen if a godly man were to stand up among any congregation and confront them about this sin? Because the Lord also tells us not to become yoked together with unbelievers and it's for one of the same reasons We take it as a suggestion, but it's not. It's a commandment, and it's one I broke just like so many others have. So please don't think I'm being "holier then thou" when I speak about this.

Today if that happened, the man wouldn't tell us to divorce our spouse though, because unlike the Israelites at that time, Jesus has already been born, so there's no longer any danger of the messianic line being corrupted. Plus, the Lord made it clear through Paul that if a believer was married to an unbeliever that they were to stay together unless the unbeliever wanted out of the marriage. Of course that only applied to someone who became a believer after the marriage, not before it. Now however, we don't have a covenant as a nation with God, instead we have a new covenant. The sin is just as serious, just as ugly as it was then, as God is the same, yesterday, today and always. However, we have forgiveness when we confess our sins and repent of them. (I'll get into what happens if we're married to an unbeliever later)

When I think of someone standing up in a church today and confronting the people about being married to unbelievers, I see total bedlam! Yelling and swearing, and telling the man to get out because he shouldn't be judging them....etc. and once they'd thrown him out, they'd all sit around feeling very self righteous and congratulating themselves and each other for not allowing some outsider to ruin their nice little church. Their pastor would probably even be leading them in this. There might be 3 or 4 people that would have slid to their knees in repentance and sorrow over bringing dishonor to God by their sin, and determining to obey His Word, but the vast majority today, I think would react in the way I just described. That's the total opposite of what happened in Ezra's time., but that's how sick the church has become for the most part.

On the other hand, what if that man confronting them had wound up in a church like Leigh's? (It really sounds awesome!) In that kind of church, maybe it would turn out like it did in Ezra's time, with the vast majority humbling themselves before God, repenting of their sin and determining to obey His Word from then on with the Lord's help. I get very excited just thinking of what kind of awesome things the Lord could do with a people like that! There's be no end to the possibilities! It's one of the reasons I can't wait for Heaven and even the Millennial Kingdom, because we'll finally be able to see what God can do with people who are wholly devoted to Him.

Now days though, it's rare to hear someone take responsibility for their sin, or having the understanding that all sin is against God, regardless of what person has been hurt by it. Even more rare is to hear anything about how ugly and nasty even what we might consider the smallest sin is. We've allowed the world to so completely desensitized us to sin, that we don't see it anywhere near what it really is. If we did, we'd react the way Ezra did every single day. We'd be heartbroken and sobbing over our sin. It would be totally abhorrent to us! We'd do what His Word says and ask Him to help us search our hearts daily to find any sin so we could be rid of the filth of it. We'd welcome anyone as friend who told us of a sin because then we could be rid of it's filth, so we'd be thankful to them instead of angry at them for finding us out.

Instead though, we tend to do what comes naturally to our sin nature. We blame other people, our leaders, our parents, our kids, our bosses, the president, our pastor, and anyone we can think of for why we've sinned. (as though that somehow takes the blame off us). We make all kinds of excuses for our sin too. We'll sometimes even suggest that it really isn't all that bad, because after all, it's not like we murdered someone. We'll tell the messenger that they're being self righteous, a goody two shoes, or that they're acting "holier then thou" by telling us about our sin, instead of being thankful and repenting. We'll look for ways to prove them wrong, even if it means changing the subject and telling them about some sin of theirs that we've suddenly noticed. We'll go off in a huff, leaving behind the impression to others that the messenger was dead wrong and we're little angels. It's really amazing what we'll do to get out of admitting our sin, when you get right down to it.

I wish the churches now days would go back to preaching about how deadly sin is, how contagious it is, how ugly and nasty it is, and how filthy it is. Those days seem to be long gone though, so we're only likely to learn about that when we read and study our Bibles with the Lord.

I’ll put a divider here for those who need to take a break before finishing this.

So what are we to do today if we are or have been guilty of that sin? First, the same thing Ezra asked for...we'd need to confess our sin - agree with God that we have sinned, and repent of it. Repentance means to turn away from the sin and do what's right according to God. In this case that would mean going to the Lord and asking His help to help us stand firm in our faith and to live in a manner that honors him.

We need to recognize that by marrying an unbeliever we've basically placed ourselves smack dab in the middle of a spiritual war zone that's going to be constantly active. Therefore we will have to deal with twice as much temptation as we would have had to normally. Our enemies, the world, our flesh, and Satan, and even our spouse will make growing in our faith much more difficult for us. There will be twice as many marital problems and issues that we'll have to deal with because of our marriage as well.

Basically by disobeying God we've put ourselves in a very dangerous position no matter how much we love our spouse or how wonderful they are. We've married "the enemy". (Remember, the Lord says that all who aren't saved are His enemies, and that we were His enemies before we were saved too. Romans 5:10; Colossians 1:21; James 4:4). We will have to be on high alert constantly until the day comes when our spouse is finally saved.

Not only will we have all these extra problems, but we won't have the wonderful fellowship and the kind of love that the Lord wanted for us to have in our marriage. When we're saved, the Lord pours His love into our hearts so we can know what love really is and He tells us what real love is in His Word, in places like 1 Cor 13. But the unsaved can only love in a more superficial way, the world's way. So we miss out on the deep, personal, intimate real love and fellowship that we could have had if we'd only obeyed God.

Praise God though that His mercy is new every morning and all that we could have had, we still can when our spouse is saved! Therefore our most important and very first job will be to pray for them and keep praying for them, and to tell them about the Lord and salvation constantly until they are saved.

Of course, we know that some Christian marriages aren't all that great, either and sometimes console ourselves with that. But the Truth is that the reason they're not that great is because one or more of the partners isn't as dedicated to Christ and His Word as they should be, because if they both were, their marriage would show it.

I remember when I had to face this sin so many years ago. I praise God for His mercy in bringing me to repentance and forgiving me. I especially thank Him too for saving my husband in spite of me! So often though, we're like children and think the Lord's rules aren't important and are only ruining our fun because we think there's no good reason for them. The truth is that God's laws are for us, not against us. They're to help us have the very best life possible here, if only we would trust and obey.

You know what would have helped me back then though? What I wish for? I wish we had good godly men like God had back in the "Bible days" or even back a hundred years ago. Men who weren't afraid to stand before their congregation and tell them that God means it when He tells us not to marry an unbeliever. I know that even today there are pastors who won't marry someone to an unbeliever, but I haven't heard of many that will tell the couple "why" he won't. (other then that it's because God says so) Nor have I heard of many that will go a step further then just saying "No, I won't marry you to them", and tell them that it's a sin.

It's really amazing how good we are at deceiving ourselves. When we're told "no", we generally don't realize it's a sin. Well, it's not so much that we don't realize it as that we don't put one and one together and don't allow ourselves to think about it at all. Instead we focus on how we're going to get what we want, which is to be married, instead of why the pastor won't do it. That's why I think it would help so much if a pastor went that one step further and stated right out front that it is a sin against God and that it's even worse when we are knowingly sinning against Him. To hear that, for most of us, would have been like a slap in the face, and just might have brought us to our senses!